Ambrosia

Once we left to go on tour, I thought that I would be able to straighten my act up a bit. I kept telling myself that my going out in Austin every night before we left was just my mini-farewell tour of sorts. However, the exact opposite happened. The women, alcohol, and drugs multiplied tenfold. Every day and night it was thrown in our fucking faces and I after losing my Angel, I just wasn’t stable enough mentally or emotionally and I got lost in the easy, temporary fixes.

Christmas Eve night was particularly crazy. We had played a show in Miami the night before, and we were off on both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day to relax a bit before the European tour started. The boys and I decided to go see what all the fuss over Miami Beach’s party life was all about. Making sure that I had a nice feeling running through me before we got started, I grabbed a mirror and a straight edge to cut up a few lines of coke that Sebastian had gotten me the night before. Snorting a line in each nostril, I took a deep breath and waited for the tingling feeling to creep up my nose, and then begin the slow drip in the back of my throat. Once I recognized the undeniable taste in my mouth, I wet my finger with my tongue, ran it across the mirror to pick up any leftover granules and then rubbed it on my gums.

Within minutes, I was alert and ready to go, hoping that I was headed out for a Christmas Eve night that I would never forget.

CHAPTER TWENTY THREE

SAVED BY AN ANGEL

I Won’t Let You Go ~ James Morrison

The Great Escape ~ P!nk

SCARLETT

“What did you just say?” I asked Cruz, hoping I didn’t hear what I thought I did.

“It’s Mason, Scarlett,” his voice cracked. “He’s in ICU in critical condition here at the University of Miami hospital. They aren’t sure if he’s gonna make it. They said the next twenty four hours are crucial. I know its Christmas and all; I’m really sorry to have to make this call, I just thought you would want to know.”

“Of course I want to know. I’m on my way. What hotel are you staying in?” My mind begin racing on what all I needed to do to get there as soon as possible.

“We are at the Bentley Hotel South Beach.”

“Are you fucking serious?” Really? Of all the hotels, that’s where they were staying? “Let me guess, she booked that one…” I knew I shouldn’t be acting bitchy with the seriousness of what was going on, but damn if I didn’t despise that bitch.

“No, Scarlett. Rat fired her before we came on tour. Jag’s here with us.”

“Oh, okay” I didn’t have time to think about the implications of what that meant; I needed to get to Miami quickly. “Well, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“You don’t have to do that. I know it’s Christmas,” he said. “I just wanted you to know.”

“No, I have to be there. I’ll call the airline as soon as I hang up with you. I’ll let you know when I get there.”

I hung up the phone and did just as I said I would, I called the airlines and booked a seat on the next flight out which was in an hour and a half. I didn’t even bother to stop and think about Ash and his family in the other room. Luckily, I kept some clothes over his house so that I wouldn’t have to always bring a bag back and forth. I began frantically throwing enough for a few days into a bag and mentally going through what all I needed for the flight. As I was going through my purse checking for my driver’s license and cash, Ash walked into the room with a confused look on his face.

“Is everything okay, Butterfly? Why are you packing a bag? What’s going on?” He was looking around the bed trying to figure out what was going on.

I knew that he wasn’t going to be happy that I was bailing on him and his family and this meal that we had prepared for Mason, but I had no choice. I had to go to him.

“Please don’t get upset, but Cruz just called. Jobu’s Rum is in Miami and Mason overdosed last night. He’s in bad shape at the hospital. They aren’t sure if he’s gonna make it Ash.” It wasn’t until I had to say the words out loud that the tears came. “I just booked a flight. I leave in a little over an hour. Please understand that I have to go.”

The disappointment showed all over his face, but instead of giving me any grief, he nodded his head. “Okay, Scarlett, whatever you think you need to do.”

“I’m so, so sorry love. If he doesn’t live, I would never forgive myself for not going. I at least need to see him.”

I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him close to me. I knew he was frustrated with the situation, but being the person he was, he tried to hide it for my sake. He slid his arms around my waist and kissed my forehead.

“Go do what you need to do. I’ll explain it to my family and I’ll be here waiting for you when you get back, okay?”

I nodded my head, trying to keep more tears from coming for saying goodbye to him. I leaned up and kissed him hard on the lips. He returned the kiss with just as much force, sliding his tongue into my mouth, rolling it against mine. It almost felt as if he was claiming me with the kiss, or reminding me that I belonged to him, since a reminder fuck wasn’t an option at the moment. We reluctantly pulled away from one another.

“I love you, Ash; I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“I know, Butterfly. I love you, too. Call me when you get there so that I know you arrived safely and let me know how he is. No matter what history I have with him, I never want anything bad to happen to him.”

On my way to the airport I called Max to let him know what was going on. He was angry that I didn’t call him immediately, saying that he would’ve come with me, but I explained to him that this was something I needed to do on my own. At some point I had to stop relying on other people to be my crutch when dealing with tough times. Having dependable family and friends to support and comfort me was a blessing, but it was time I flew with my own wings. An hour later as the plane ascended into the air, I did just that.

Walking through Miami International Airport at nearly nine o clock on Christmas evening was like walking through a ghost town. All of the restaurants and gift shops were closed and the airport staff was minimal. I think I only passed maybe five or six other travelers in the entire building. Thankfully, I didn’t have to go to baggage claim since I only had my one carry on, so I followed the signs to the taxi pick up. Every minute I got closer to seeing Mason, the anxiety and fear continued to build. I had no idea what to expect, what he would look like, if they would even let me see him.

I first called Cruz to let him know that I had arrived and to see if I should go to the hospital or hotel first. He instructed me to meet him at the hotel because it wasn’t visiting hours again at the hospital until eight in the morning. I had completely forgotten to call and book a room, but he told me not to worry, that I could just stay in Mase’s room. I then called Ash and Max to let them know that I had landed safely and was headed to the hotel.

The entire taxi ride to the hotel I beat myself up over being partly to blame for Mason’s condition. I had dropped a huge bomb on him at the wedding that night, not only did I completely reject his plea for a chance to work things out, I also told him I had slept with one of his good friends. I wasn’t sure what to believe exactly about the phone call I had with Bentley that night, but after his reaction to what I had assumed was his choice to be with her, I was pretty sure that nothing had happened. That made me feel even more responsible for the downward spiral that had led to this awful outcome.

If I had just demanded to talk to Mase that night, or even waited until the following morning when he was coming home to talk to him, and get his side of the story before making unfounded assumptions… If I had not got so drunk that I couldn’t keep myself from making senseless decisions… If I had not been so hurtful and ugly to him when he came to the wedding… If I had checked on him after leaving him in that state, I knew by just looking at him he was probably close to self-destruction.

As the taxi pulled up to the hotel and all I was left with was a bunch of “what-ifs.” I had become a true believer in fate and destiny and everything happening for a reason. Once Ash and I had gotten together, I realized that he truly was the other half of my soul, and the undying, eternal love that we shared was the key to my happiness. But it didn’t make it any easier knowing that a man I loved, a man that played a huge role in making me the person who I had become, was lying in a hospital bed on the other side of the city fighting for his life… and that I was most likely one of the main reasons he was there. With a defeated sigh, I opened the door and climbed out of the car after paying the fare and adding a nice tip.

The outside of the hotel was beautiful, a four-story, white trendy building, located oceanfront and right in the middle of what seemed to be the tourist area of the beach. It was dark outside when I arrived, and the outside lighting rose from the ground, illuminating the two large palm trees outside as well as the name spelled across the top floor: Bentley Hotel. Staying here was actually a blessing in disguise, as it reminded me that I wasn’t the only contributor to this horrible situation. I walked into the luxurious lobby hesitantly, unsure of where I should go exactly. I walked over and sat my bag on a large chair in a lounge area in order to call Cruz when I felt two strong arms wrap around me from behind.

“Scarlett, I’m so glad you’re here,” Cruz said as his voice cracked.

I turned around to face and hug him properly; when I saw his swollen red eyes and tear stained cheeks, I nearly lost it. Hugging him tightly, I tried to comfort him, “Oh Cruz, it’s okay. It’s all gonna be okay. Whatever happens… I promise.”

After a few moments, he pulled back from me and grabbed my bag out of my chair. “Come on, Scarlett, it’s late. Let me take you up to the room so that you can rest. Tomorrow’s gonna be a long day.”

We took the elevator to the top floor and he ushered me into a one bedroom suite that was absolutely gorgeous. Mason’s clothes were thrown about on the unmade bed and an empty bag of his favorite jalapeno chips was on the counter. Seeing his things caused a huge lump to form in my throat.

“Well, make yourself at home; I know Rat would want you to,” he said, trying not to breakdown again.

After I gave him another hug, thanked him for everything, and promised him I would call if I needed anything at all, he went down the hall to his room. At first I just stood there, not really sure what to do. I didn’t really want to go through any of his things, but I needed to put my bag away and order some room service, seeing that I hadn’t had anything to eat since breakfast. In the bedroom I found the dinner menu and quickly called down to order a BLT and fries. I figured I had time to take a quick shower and get comfortable before the food arrived, so I hurried into the bathroom.

Twenty minutes later, I was clean and changed and waiting for my dinner. I sat down on the couch to watch some mindless television when I saw Mase’s guitar propped against the end table. I scooted over to grab it, hoping that some musical therapy would help much like it did after I lost Evie, when I saw the sheets of paper with music and lyrics scribbled all over them spread out on the table next to a mirror and razorblade.