Alpha Divided
Page 49
“By finding that place within that’s the source of your power. Then, you will be able to lead this coven.”
I couldn’t contain the shocked gasp. “No. I can’t. That’s not what I’m here for. I need to find the next leader.”
“Your Grams—my sister—found the next leader.”
“She found me, but I’m in the pack. I’m an alpha. I don’t know where I really stand yet, but I’m stronger than most. I can’t be in two places at once.”
“No, mijita. You are of two places and you will always be in two places. You think your Grams didn’t know what would happen? You think she made a mistake?”
Honestly? Yes. I kind of did think she made a mistake.
“She knew what would happen to you. She knew that your path would be hard, and she prayed over it, but you cannot change what is meant to be.”
“Rosa,” I said to her, pleading for her to understand. “It’s not just me who doesn’t want to be here. The coven doesn’t want me either.” Luciana didn’t want to give me to the wolves, but she hadn’t paid a visit since my first day here.
“Now that is a useful way to spend your time. You need to be going around and making friends here, getting to know what these brujos really think.”
She’d lost her mind. It didn’t matter if I had friends. This wasn’t my job. “I don’t even want to run the pack.” I wasn’t sure if that was the road I was heading down, but I was a strong alpha and it could happen—it almost certainly would happen to Dastien—so at the very least, I was bound to end up the Were version of a first lady. But Tia Rosa was talking about a whole other level of leadership. “Why would I want to run the coven on top of that?”
She grasped one of my hands. Her skin was so soft and papery thin; I had to be careful with her. She was human, both old and fragile.
“As you grow, you learn that life is rarely about doing what you want. We all do what we must, and that is even more true for the powerful ones like you. My sister saw the times changing. To stop war, you must be the link that unifies the pack and coven…and eventually, all supernaturals. When the time comes for the world to know the truth, the people will need someone to look to. A trustworthy leader who knows what it’s like to be human.”
I couldn’t breath. There wasn’t enough air.
No longer able to sit still, I pulled away from Rosa to pace the small room. “I can’t be that person. I’m just me. I’m a normal girl.”
“You’re not normal, and it’s past time for you to let go of that delusion.” Rosa stood and walked to the door. “When you’re ready, if you want my help, you know where to find me.”
“I’m not sure I’m allowed off the compound.”
“Not allowed off the compound to visit la Aquelarre’s wise woman? I think I’d have something to say about that. You send Luciana my way if it’s not allowed.”
I cracked a grin. Rosa might be old, but she still had her wits and sass. “I’ll think about it.”
I opened the door for her, and she patted my cheek. “I’ll be seeing you soon.”
I was still sitting on the couch, trying to absorb Rosa’s words when Daniel stepped into the house. His morning lessons must’ve been done. I glanced at my watch. How long had I been staring into space?
He started chatting about the spells he wanted to try today, but I held a hand up.
“Dude. Four days of trying something and getting the same results…don’t you think we’ve had enough? I mean, a hole in the roof? Really?”
He crossed his arms. “You’re giving up?”
I shrugged.
“Didn’t you break the curse on Meredith?”
“Yeah. But I majorly fucked up when I tried to use magic to do it. She almost died. I used my normal powers plus some Were stuff to actually break it.” I rubbed my eyes, trying to make sense of everything. “Maybe I’m messing everything up so badly because I didn’t grow up around spells and magic, but some of this stuff…it’s just not working for me.”
“Well you have to learn it.”
“Says who?”
He looked away from me with a sigh. “Says my mother.”
I snorted. “Yeah, okay.” I hoped the sarcasm was thick enough for him to pick up on it. “You’ve been really nice to me and I’ve had fun, but I’m not sure that we’re getting anywhere with these lessons. I keep getting it wrong. I follow the all the steps, and I get the complete inverse reaction. Do you think it’s because of the Were in me?”