After the Storm

She paused and looked with a half-startled air upon Mrs. Everet to

mark the effect of this revelation. But Rose made no response and

showed no surprise, however she might have been affected by the

singular admission of her friend.

"It has been all in vain," continued Irene "that I have pushed the

thought aside--called it absurd, insane, impossible--back it would

come and take its old place. And, stranger still, out of facts that

I educed to prove its fallacy would come corroborative suggestions.

I think it is well for my peace of mind that I have not been in the

way of hearing about him or of seeing him. Since we parted it has

been as if a dark curtain had fallen between us; and, so far as I am

concerned, that curtain has been lifted up but once or twice, and

then only for a moment of time. So all my thoughts of him are joined

to the past. Away back in that sweet time when the heart of girlhood

first thrills with the passion of love are some memories that haunt

my soul like dreams from Elysium. He was, in my eyes, the

impersonation of all that was lovely and excellent; his presence

made my sense of happiness complete; his voice touched my ears as

the blending of all rich harmonies. But there fell upon him a

shadow; there came hard discords in the music which had entranced my

soul; the fine gold was dimmed. Then came that period of mad strife,

of blind antagonism, in which we hurt each other by rough contact.

Finally, we were driven far asunder, and, instead of revolving

together around a common centre, each has moved in a separate orbit.

For years that dark period of pain has held the former period of

brightness in eclipse; but of late gleams from that better time have

made their way down to the present. Gradually the shadows are giving

away. The first state is coming to be felt more and more as the true

state--as that in best agreement with what we are in relation to

each other. It was the evil in us that met in such fatal

antagonism--not the good; it was something that we must put off if

we would rise from natural and selfish life into spiritual and

heavenly life. It was our selfishness and passion that drove us

asunder. Thus it is, dear Rose, that my thoughts have been wandering

about in the maze of life that entangles me. In my isolation I have

time enough for mental inversion--for self-exploration--for idle

fancies, if you will. And so I have lifted the veil for you;

uncovered my inner life; taken you into the sanctuary over whose

threshold no foot but my own had ever passed."

There was too much in all this for Mrs. Everet to venture upon any

reply that involved suggestion or advice. It was from a desire to

look deeper into the heart of her friend that she had spoken of her

meeting with Mr. Emerson. The glance she obtained revealed far more

than her imagination had ever reached.