A Humble Heart (Hollywood Hearts 1)

After she lost that job she was black listed. She would never work in emergency care again. She moved onto residential programs helping kids. The jobs were stressful, paid poorly and were god awful except for the kids who were the only plus in the jobs. She got along with all the kids the staff deemed “losers” and “bad seeds”.

Her relationship progressed with Jeff even though Jeff’s family turned out to be an absolute nightmare. Something she never contemplated. They were horrid people. Thankfully there weren’t that many people in his family. Everything in his family seemed to wrap around his mother. Dana felt uncomfortable with his mother the first minute she laid eyes on her.

The smorgasbord of mental problems in his family made Dana cringe. His family consisted of a small group of people that would drive Dr. Phil to drink. Dana avoided his family as best she could. It was a blessing that Jeff wasn’t close to his family. Just the thought of spending weekends and holidays with them was enough to send her screaming into the night.

Things between them cooled off considerably after the “I do’s.” Jeff became obsessed with his computer and video games. Something she was unaware that he did when he wasn’t around her. She knew he used a computer, he was a computer tech after all, but she didn’t know it was an obsession.

Jeff only came out of his office for meals and then he'd return to his "man town." Soon they slept separately. There were a thousand and one excuses how that happened, but the truth was they weren’t friends and weren’t in love. It happens. She wasn’t sure how it happened but they ended up pregnant twice. Jeff wasn’t a part of either pregnancy. He showed no interest and didn’t talk about it. Something she hadn't expected from him. She thought he would be an attentive husband and father, boy had she been wrong.

Her attention went back to the video playing. A small smile touched her lips. She liked seeing Edward. Hell, she liked seeing anyone relaxed and enjoying life completely. It gave her hope and an ache for what life could be, scratch that, should be for her. She loved her daughter and son very much, but part of her deeply regretted how life had turned out for her.

She was a twenty-eight year old stay at home mom of two small children in an unhappy marriage. Dana was sure she wasn’t the exception, just the rule. She had no doubt men and women both got themselves into a loveless marriage only because they confused good sex with love or even worse she suspected she had been young and na?ve and in love with the idea of being in love.

“Mommy!” Cole cried.

Dana pushed her desk chair back and went to see her small son. This was part of her nightly routine. Cole slept in his older sister’s room until he woke up around eleven. Then he came to sleep in her room. It didn’t bother her that her very sweet two year old son kept hogging her king size bed on her. They needed each other. Cole was a sensitive tough guy and she hated being alone at night when the loneliness seemed to multiply.

She chuckled softly when she saw Cole standing in front of the baby safety gate that kept him from roaming the house at night. He stood waiting for her in only his diaper with his arms up in the air with his blanket fiercely in his hand as he silently demanded her to pick him up.

After tucking Cole into her bed she turned her attention back to the task at hand. She closed the video and maximized the file she’d been working on earlier, her third book. It was the second book about her favorite characters she'd created, Christian and Bailey.

The first book was sent off two months ago with the hope that a publisher would pick it up and sign her. She sent out ten thick envelopes and so far nothing. She pushed the aching in the pit of her stomach aside and focused. She had a game plan and she wouldn’t be distracted. She worked ten to fifteen hours a day on her books. There were eight unfinished books on her laptop that she tended to. She worked with each one until she became stumped then moved on only to come back later. It was relaxing as well as stimulating. Something she hadn’t found in a long time.

They were her life apart from her children. Hell, she was doing this for her children. She didn’t have a job, a car or close friends or relatives. There was no clear way for her to escape this marriage, this life. Her only hope at the moment was a contract for one of her books.

She knew if she ever signed a contract for a book she was out of here. Jeff wouldn’t fight her on the divorce. The only problem she would have would be custody. Although he didn’t show it he did love the kids in his own way. But once she was free she was out of here. She didn’t want to stay in this small New England town where she’d lived her entire life. There were things she deeply loved about New England like its history, many of its tourist attractions and some of its culture, but there were a lot of things she didn’t enjoy like freezing her ass off from late October until early May.

Dana finished writing another chapter in the lives of Christian and Bailey and shut down her computer. The second book was coming along nicely. Her only hope was that someone thought the first one was good. She walked to the bathroom and drew a bath, her favorite and only pastime besides reading.

She settled into the tub with a good book, the latest in her favorite series. It was an addictive series that had her coming back for more. This was the third time she was reading this particular book.

“Dana,” Jeff said, barging into the bathroom. He didn’t bother knocking, hadn’t since her first pregnancy when she'd been forced to spend hours in the tub because of her back problems.

Jeff stopped in front of the tub. She looked up to see he was holding a stack of mail in his hands. “I forgot to give these to you.” He held out the mail. She sighed and placed her book on the side of the tub and took the mail from him.

“Listen, I wanted to talk to you about something,” Jeff started. He looked at her face. He always did no matter what she wore or didn’t. They were long past the point of checking each other out. She had gained a good sixty pounds since they met, her skin was pale and dry, and her hair was dry and brittle. The usual complaints of a stay at home mom or so she'd been told. Jeff had gained a considerable amount of weight as well, but that wasn’t the reason she wasn’t interested in him. She just didn’t like the person he’d become.

“Dana, I’m going to replace my monitor tomorrow. I found a new one, an HD monitor online that will go well with my computer.”

“What’s wrong with the monitor you have, Jeff?” she asked, already dreading his answer; the new one was better. That was the reason for all his spending.