1105 Yakima Street
Page 43
Gloria went into her kitchen, filled a glass and brought it to the living room. Joni had taken a seat on her sofa. When she handed her the tumbler, she saw that the other woman’s hand shook visibly.
Joni took a small sip and then wrapped both hands around the glass. “Chad doesn’t know I’m here.”
Gloria would have been surprised if he had.
“He told me he was stopping by later today. His shift doesn’t end until five, so he won’t be here until almost six and I thought… I hoped maybe the two of us could talk before he arrived.”
“Okay.” Gloria tried to look relaxed, but the tension between her shoulders held her rigid.
“I understand Chad told you about us?”
“He did.” Gloria didn’t elaborate.
“He told me about you, too.”
Gloria nodded.
“And about the baby,” Joni added.
“He’s going to be a good father,” Gloria said. He’d been so caring and thoughtful, and made it clear how much he already loved their baby.
“I think so, too.” Leaning forward, Joni put her glass on the coffee table, taking a moment to position a coaster first. Now that her hands were free she didn’t seem to know what to do with them. She clasped them in her lap and stared down at the carpet.
“Do you love him?” Gloria asked. She wanted to know where the other woman stood before they continued this awkward discussion.
Joni looked up and her eyes filled with tears. “I’m afraid so.”
Gloria felt like crying herself, but struggled to maintain her poise. “I’m afraid I do, too,” she admitted. Funny that she was so willing to tell the other woman how she felt about Chad, but couldn’t tell him. It’d taken her a long time to recognize the depth of her feelings. Now it might be too late.
“You’ve hurt him badly.”
“I wasn’t in a good state of mind… . I regret what happened.”
“The baby, too?” Joni asked.
“No,” Gloria answered. “I’ll never regret the baby.”
Her answer made Joni frown. If anything, it appeared to affect her even more strongly. “I… Chad loves the baby. That’s all he talks about when we’re together, and I suspect he loves you. No, I don’t suspect. I know he does.”
Gloria wasn’t sure how to respond. “Chad and I met when I was at a low point in my life,” Gloria began, feeling she needed to explain. “I’d just lost my adoptive parents. I was an only child and they were both only children, so I had no one. No aunts, no uncles, no cousins. No family. We… Chad and I felt an immediate physical attraction and, well…”
Joni looked away and seemed to be studying the view outside the window. The Bremerton shipyard showed clearly in the distance, with the mothballed aircraft carriers and submarines against the backdrop of a metallic gray sky.
Gloria found her own attention wandering and forced herself to focus on her guest. “I’m not sure why you’re here,” she said.
“I came because I need to know how you feel about Chad.”
“Does it matter?”
“Yes, it matters a great deal.” Joni picked up the water glass and took one long swallow. “I know what I have to do now.” She set the tumbler down in a decisive movement.
“And that is?”
Joni wiped the tears from her cheeks. “I’m ending my relationship with Chad.”
“Ending it,” Gloria repeated. “But…you just finished telling me that you’re in love with him.”
“I am…but I know the odds and they aren’t in my favor. Chad loves you and pretty soon you’ll give birth to his son. I care enough about him to bow out now.”
Gloria had trouble believing the other woman was sincere, but the tears streaking Joni’s cheeks told her she meant every word.
“The only thing I need from you,” Joni said, then paused to gather her composure. “All I ask is that you love Chad. He’s a good man, and a caring physician. I just hope you appreciate what you’ve got. If you don’t, trust me, some other woman’s going to do her best to steal him away and that…that other woman might well be me.”
Gloria flattened her hand over her heart. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Then don’t say anything. Remember what I told you. If you hurt Chad again, you can’t claim I didn’t give you fair warning.” Reaching for her purse she walked to the door.
Gloria followed her. “You really love him, don’t you.” It was a statement rather than a question.
“More than either of you will ever realize. It’s only because I love him that I’m willing to give him up. Don’t think I’m doing this for you or the baby. I’m doing this for Chad. Just make him happy.”
“I…will.”
The apartment seemed to vibrate with the shock of Joni’s declaration. Gloria stood by the door, hardly able to absorb what had happened. Chad loved her. She’d sensed that he did, even though he’d kept his distance, emotional and otherwise, since their last breakup.
Chad showed up at the apartment three hours later. Thankfully that meant she’d had time to think about Joni’s visit and analyze her own feelings.
“Hi,” he said as he came in. He appeared ill at ease, not quite himself.
“Hi,” she returned. They’d planned to go Christmas-tree shopping. Chad didn’t want her hauling in a tree and decorating it while she was pregnant. She guessed that his offer was really an excuse to see her again. Not that she was complaining; she welcomed any and every opportunity to be with him.
“Do you mind if we don’t go shopping for a tree today?” he asked. “I’m not in the mood.”
“That’s fine. We can do it another time.”
He walked over to the window and stood there, gazing into the night. Lights blinked out at sea.
“Is everything okay?” she asked, wondering if he’d lost a patient. He took any death personally, especially a child’s.
“I had a visitor this afternoon,” he said.
Gloria walked toward him until they were only a foot or so apart, both staring into the darkness. “Interesting, because I did, too.”
“Anyone I know?”
“Joni.”
Chad nearly dislocated his neck as he jerked toward her. “Joni came to see you?”
Gloria clenched her hands and nodded. “She needed the answer to an important question.”
He waited for her to continue.
It took Gloria a moment to find the courage to explain. “She came to ask me if I was in love with you.”
“How did you answer her?”
“I told her what happened when I first moved to Cedar Cove—and why.”
“I take it you left out the part about falling into bed together a few hours after we met.”
“Yes.”
His expression grim, he started for the door.
“Where are you going?” she asked.
“I think I’ve heard everything I need.”
“Don’t you want to hear my answer?”
“I already have. You gave her an excuse for your behavior and left it at that.”
“As a matter of fact, I didn’t leave it at that. I answered her question.”
“And?” he asked, sounding bored with the entire conversation. He seemed almost eager to escape.
“I told her I’m in love with you.” She held herself straight, fearing his reaction. He might laugh in her face and say he didn’t believe her. Certainly she hadn’t done anything to reveal how she felt about him. On the contrary, she’d tried over and over to prove that she had no affection for him whatsoever.
He said nothing. But he turned around, obviously studying her to see if she was telling the truth.
Gloria met his gaze boldly.
“Joni came to see me, too,” he said after a moment.
“I figured she might.” The other woman had said she’d be seeing Chad, although Gloria hadn’t expected it to be this soon.
“She broke off our relationship.”
Gloria felt almost sick to her stomach. “I’m sorry.”
“She knew it was over. It was from the minute I learned about the baby. The problem was, I didn’t realize it myself, not until recently. I never stopped loving you, Gloria. I tried to get you out of my mind and my heart, but it didn’t work. At night you haunted my dreams. During the day I imagined you around every corner. You’ve had a grip on me from the night we met.”
Gloria’s experience had been the same, only she hadn’t been willing to admit it. “I’m so sorry, Chad,” she whispered. She stepped closer and he did, too. “I can’t seem to do anything right when it comes to you.”
He broke into a smile. “I disagree. You’re giving me a son.”
“I’m giving you my heart, too.”
He opened his arms and she walked into them. He held her tight against him and whispered into her hair, “It took you long enough.”
“I don’t understand why I fought you so hard.”
“I don’t, either.” He kissed the top of her head and moved down the side of her face, finally reaching her lips.
When Chad pulled away minutes later, Gloria felt weak and breathless. She thought about taking him to her bedroom, which was how these sessions usually ended. But she wouldn’t allow that to happen this time. They couldn’t let sex confuse the issue or distract them from what they needed to work out.
“Why do you make me feel like this?” She’d never reacted physically to any man the way she did to Chad.
“I don’t know. I don’t care. Just don’t change.”
She clung to him, kissing him with tears running down her cheeks.
“I want us to get married,” he said.
“Okay.” It wasn’t the romantic proposal she’d always dreamed of, but it was good enough.
“Soon.”
“Okay.”
“Before Christmas.”
“Christmas?” That was three weeks away!
“You’ll move in with me.”
All these commands were given between lengthy, heated kisses. “With you…”
“Yes, move in with me,” he said again.
“Can’t you move here?”
“No.”
“My family’s here. My job…”
“You have a new family now. You, me and the baby. And there are jobs in Tacoma, too.”
“Yes. Maybe, later on, I can join their police force.”
He nodded. “Besides, it’s not like you’d be that far from Cedar Cove and the McAfees.”
“True.”
Another kiss, this one even more potent and powerful. “Chad,” she whispered, gasping for breath. “I do love you.”
“I know. I’ve always known.”
“You did?”
“Yes.”
“Oh.”
“You talk too much.”
“Sorry.”
He laughed. “Don’t apologize.”